A Happy Life and Human Intimacy

Where does the pursuit of happiness take us when we think of the continuation of our species? When we think of achieving some illusive semblance of world peace, where does it begin?  Does it begin in the halls of Congress, the boardrooms of corporations, in our intimate relationships, or the proverbial bedroom of every couple in the world?

Whether one is an atheist or a believer in God all must acknowledge the existence of the creative force that allows us to continue existing as human beings.  We are after all here in a bubble of time with eternity on both sides of our individual and collective existence. 

Within each of us exists elements of power that allows for the circle of life to continue.  These powers are not held by a single person within themselves.  

Even though we die by the billions on a continuous basis there is also continuous replenishment of our human species.  The life forces that determine the creation of a new soul are held separate by two genders.  One half is held by men and the other half is held by women. Is there a right way and a wrong way to exercise these capacities?

At some point in life, almost every single person that reaches puberty will have experience with sex and an encounter that imprints on their mind in some way.  It may happen before puberty.  It can happen on purpose or by accident in a thousand different ways. It can be chosen or forced.  One thing is certain, it will happen. Those circumstances will have a powerful effect on the course of a person's life. 

From the first experience and after, neuropathways are formed. Electro and chemical-reactions take place in the brain and are stored in memory hardwiring our attitudes and personality.  From that starting point, many things good or bad can develop based on how we perceive ourselves and the understanding we gain from good counsel and examples of relationships we have witnessed.

If the sexual experience of the majority of humans does not follow certain courses of accomplishment then the foundation of our existence comes into question. The possibility of ever achieving peace in this world becomes a doubtful achievement if we can't develop it in our homes and family relationships.  

One observable division in our society has to do with the value of life.  Does a human being in the womb have intrinsic value and by divine design and a sacred purpose for existing?  The other prevalent attitude is that life only has an extrinsic value that is assigned to it when it begins to exist under the influence of societal forces.

Whether you think sex is ordained of God or merely the result of evolution, its role in human existence is much different than it is in the animal kingdoms, where it is a function of instinct.  Even though some exotic mating rituals exist, it is hardwired in their DNA. 

While humans and animals may be driven by hormonally based instincts the vast majority of human beings experience unique forms of euphoria and pleasure almost on demand that leads to procreation and intimate bonding that can lead to deeper emotional levels. In circumstances where commitment, trust, and love are present we find the ideal environment to nurture new life and the next generation of souls to rule the earth.

Sex can be a bonding or dividing experience. The commitment of the partners to each other and fidelity change the feelings and chemicals in the brain that evoke the emotional responses associated with the act of being together. A selfish purpose can lead to eventual dissatisfaction and looking for some new experience, leaving in its wake broken lives and emotions.

Normalized attractions between men and women will continue our existence. Mental illness or personal choices to act a certain way that counters this should not be promoted. Extinction level attitudes cannot be normalized or else we face dire consequences across all economies. Personalities can be complex and it would seem to some that some propensities are born in a person's identity.  

Many will know one of those innocent souls that for whatever reason has no interest in sex or an inclination to it no matter what the stimulus may be. They shy away or are not interested.  Some claim they are attracted only to those of the same sex and that it is not something they can control.  Others say they choose to have sex with whoever they like and the gender of their partner doesn't matter. The normalization of the exceptions through legislation should not be the goal of the government.

Sex for the sake of sex can be engaged alone. Self-stimulation has its consequences. The feelings we experience from self-stimulation can become self-centered and confining.  This self-focused practice evokes its own set of neurotic consequences and potential developmental disorders.  How do sexual addictions and deviations develop? 

Sexual attraction disorders can be the result of mental illness, habit, practice, or exposure to ideas and concepts from many sources.  The problems that occur are from a failure to have real conversations in the home regarding sex and intimacy can be avoided. There is nothing wrong with understanding sex and the human body and still waiting for marriage to try it out.  

Sex outside of the love, trust, and commitment that should exist in marriage doesn't lead to those virtues in future relationships. Repentance can restore commitment to the values of chastity that are the foundation of human intimacy that will nurture both the participants and those.

Charlie Brown